The Greatest Pain in Life

  The greatest pain in life
is not to die, but to be ignored.

To lose the person you love so
much to another who doesn't care at all.

To have someone you care so about so much throw a party...
and not tell you about it.

When your favorite person on earth
neglects to invite you to his graduation.

To have people think that you don't care.

The greatest pain in life,
is not to die,
but to be forgotten.

To be left in the dust after another's great achievement.

To never get a call from a friend,
just saying "hi".

When you show someone your innermost thoughts and they laugh in your face.

For friends to always be too busy to console you when you need someone to lift your spirits.

When it seems like the only person who cares about you,
is you.

Life is full of pain,
but does it ever get better?

Will people ever care about each other,
and make time for those who are in need?

Each of us has a part to play
in this great show we call life.

Each of us has a duty to mankind
to tell our friends we love them.

If you do not care about your friends
you will not be punished.

You will simply be ignored...
forgotten...
as you have done to others.

 

Taurus: Magic is in the air. Unexpected reality comes to life like a miracle.**

I M PISSED. I M FED UP. I M ANGRY. I M STRESSED OUT. I HAVE HAD ENUFF! all because of e fndb project. yes its all my fault. wasted so much of my time. n now i panic. fndb assignment is due on mon. or so i tot. juz checked it on OLE myself n phew~ e deadline is on FRI.stilll hai~ only started doing this week.... even though it was given about a month ago..-.-zzzz.... wth.. every1 in class (i know de) damn slack. damn cham. no motivation. wanna get help also dunno who to go to...AAAHHHHH~!!!!!! shen ah~ jiu jiu wo ba~ now its only me alone. gotta depend on myself. if i rely on others think i will only get to nowhere. now its serious business 4 me. no more nonsense. ppl who r of no help pls stay away from me.

gonna cont doing my fndb liao... its damn difficult lor... spent alot of time thinking bout e tables blah...moreover i dun have e notes with me now >:( gotta go OLE n open e damn stupid file. guess i will only have less den 3hrs of slp later. gotta go sch early to type those thingys out using e oracle b4 e prsp lessons start. den will b working in e afternoon... zzzz... 'mei shi jian, wo mei shi jian...' now i m gonna b selfish liao... its not my fault. i worked 4 it.its all my effort. my hard work better pay off...

yup.. today went lab n did it alone. no distractions. skipped my cmaths lec.irritating things happened. e 1st lab de printer got prob so couldnt print them out. wasted so much time to cut n paste blah.. attach to email blah... din bring my zip disk along to.. zzz.... den.. change lab. at e 2nd lab saw some 'jian' ren. a group of girls n 1 guy. all flirting ard.. damn noisy. den at 1 pt of time, i saw 1 of e girls walking along e rows of computers. 4 wat? c if any1 so careless left their hp there. -.- she said it herself to her frens n i heard it loud n clear. JIAN RITE? wah lau... 1st time i c this kind of thing lor.. gave her tt kind of 'dun try to b funny' kind of look when she was checking out e next row of PCs on my rite after a girl left e rm. bth... its not tt she HAPPEN to c it lor... its tt she actually go FIND 4 it.. really nuting to say about this kind of ppl. hopeless. u ppl better b careful of ur stuffs. hai~ my 7200...

yup.... was late 4 work liao. took bus anyway. din wanna waste my $ on cab. n know wat.. something 'suay' happened. i brough my uniform but not my pass! so how to go work?! >:( found out only after i reached e airport n was searching 4 it. had to go all e way home to get it.. hai.. bad day...

Taurus: A strong, intimate, physical connection happens for you this evening.** <-- fri's... yeah rite..

Li.di.ya turned back time on 12:45:00 AM.

Taurus: People have shifted their way of thinking - they are more selfish now.**

had e sucky cmsk subject today.din wanna go de coz had to tok in front of e class on a topic tt e teacher would make us pick out from an envelope.. but no choice.. cannot run away from it anway. this wk dun do there will surely b another day 4 it. no way. cannot b a coward. so i went. sat there 4 2 hrs till it was my turn. last in class as usual ma coz of ma surname... ZHOU. was like waiting to die like tt. damn long. i damn heng lor. picked an ez 1... wat would i do with e money if i have 1million dollars. wth.. ez rite?! wasted only... i heng heng got wat i wanted lor coz e rest were worse... my ambition.. my passion.. fav tv show..-.- wth to say man.. but too bad i wasted it.. actually tot wat i wanted to say liao if i am to pick this few ez 1s.. but e moment i stood in front i began to 'kou chi'. 'travel' n i dunno said wat...'tra-vel' or wat..'tra-fel'..-.-""""' kept saying i would do this n this.. blah blah blah... no "because blah blah blah"... no conclusion also.. coz i tot e way i said it how to have 1? BLEAH! think those ppl who din do well 4 e other sucky topics they picked r 'suay' lor.. they sure would have done better if they were to have my topic. DAMN EZ LOR! ARGH!! stupid.. it was like might as well skipped e lesson n go to e lab to do my fndb assignment coz i will get f9 anyway.. hai... though had a bit of support from e girls but still... not much diff lor.. more stress only.. coz i will only disappoint them.... damn 'mei lian jian ren'... so ez also cock up..-.-

today damn have no mood lor.. dunno is it coz my "aunty" come visit me liao... on my way to sch saw my classmate cai er at e bus stop.. din c her till she called me.. kena shock.. on e bus din tok to her or wat coz i sat in front.. like damn unfriendly hor.. =( but dunno wat to say also ma.. in sch we dun tok de.. den in sch damn irritated lor.. seems to me tt i have no time to complete a lot of things.. assignments blah blah blah.. i m running out of time man! all due next wk n i m less den half done with them... shit. at apel tut cai er offered me sweet but i din wan it. usually i m not used to take things from ppl i dun know v well de ma.. but c her like tt dun wanna make her think tt i hate her or had anything against her la(on e bus i already so bad liao).. so i took it. i was like.."no thanks.." den c her face.." ok la.. lai lai lai.. give me. i eat la... give u face.." haha... c her so sad ma.. den during e cmsk e group of girls were sitting behind us so we did tok a little lor.. not bad la actually they all.. mayb tt time c they prettier than me den i jealous only.. lol... ya la.. seriously they not bad lor..mayb i kept c-ing my face in e mirror so many times tt i m so sick of it liao. e stare stare de also tok a bit.. not bad la.. juz tt tt time din like her keep staring at me.

let me tell u.. i HATE ppl to stare at me. look 4 more den 10sec also cannot .. when i look at them they still stare a bit b4 turning away.. those with tt kind of look worse.. not happy like tt.. as if i have done anything wrong. watever it is... i hate tt k. whether its a fren(if there's anything wrong juz tell me k.. dun juz keep looking at me as if i should know wat e prob is), my dad, my aunt, my sis, ppl i dunno, my boyfren(tt is if i ever have 1). cannot be to admire me lor... coz i wouldnt think of it as tt .. disgusting.. mayb i m really too sick of myself liao... i know i m not ugly la.. but i wouldnt b pretty either.. juz normal. to b normal i m already happy... those damn pretty de i muz say they muz thank their parents man... they r only lucky tt they have e looks... those ugly de not their fault ma.. they din choose to b this way.who wans to b anyway? cant stand those who think as if they r "god".. its juz on e outside.. they r juz human like e rest of us..wats so great? i dun give a damn about them..c also dun wanna c. mayb tts y i dun hang ard with them..coz most of e time all i c r a bunch of useless ('zhong kan bu zhong yong' de) pigs who think too highly of themselves. k la.. mayb i 'zi bei' , jealous only k.. but seriously.. some of them(u can commonly on streets, along orchard rd) walking with their head high up. k.. mayb tts wat confidence is all about but some of them damn snobbish lor..'mu zhong wu ren' ah...

some kind of story to share:

juz now was surfing e web n i came across this story about the tree,the leaf n the wind. heard it on 93.3 too i think some time ago... i m not gd with words.. dunno how to say it... so it would b better if i copy n paste it here, then u all would get e whole thingy.. or story... here it goes:

Story of Leaf’s Departure

Tree:
My name is Tree. Why? It is because of my talent in painting trees. Through time, all my paintings were trademarked with a tree at the lower right corner.
I have dated 5 girls in my Pre-U years. But, there was this one special ordinary girl who I am very fond of that I have never dated. She totally captivated me with her innocence, honesty, intelligence, cuteness and fragility. Felt as though I have to protect her from this ugly world. Reason why I’ve never dated her is that I felt she was too ordinary for me, or maybe, I am afraid to taint a heart as pure as hers. Her name is Leaf. We were good friends.
Through the 3 years, she watched me as I dated each girl. It must have been a terrible feeling to see the one you love going after another. ‘Cause each time that I did, she cried. She didn’t know that I know she cried, but I know. When I was with my second girlfriend, she bumped into us accidentally when we were kissing. Embarrassed she was, but she smiled and said, “Sorry, go on…” before running off. The following day, her eyes were as swollen as walnuts. I just made fun of her the whole day just to hide my emotions from her. She was then alone in the classroom, crying. I was there instead of being at my soccer training, but she did not know. She cried for an hour. I watched her.
My fourth girlfriend did not like her. There was this one incident when both of them quarreled. I figured that my girlfriend must have started it as she wasn’t the type to start a quarrel. But, despite knowing this, I told her to stop. Her eyes were filled with tears as I walked off with my girlfriend. It must have hurt. Even I felt hurt for hurting her. The following day, she continued to laugh and joke with me as though nothing had happened.
When I broke off with my fifth girlfriend, I asked her out. I told her that I have something that I wanna tell her. Coincidentally, she has something to tell me as well. I told her about my break up and she told me of her attachment. I know the very moment who the guy was. His name is Wind. He had been going after her for a while now. An interesting cute guy filled with energy. His pursuit for her has been spread throughout the school. I congratulate her, hiding my pain within me. Now I know how it felt. It was terrible. It feels as though a vacuum from with the heart is sucking the walls in, unbearably painful. I broke down and cry when I got home. It hurt, and it hurt more to think of the pain she went through for me.
Ten days after, during my graduation, I read an sms. It was sent on the day I went out with her. It says, “Leaf left. Not because of Wind’s pursuit, but because Tree did not asked Leaf to stay.”

Leaf:
I liked collecting leaves and I admired them. I feel that it takes lots of courage for a leaf to leave the tree she had relied on for so long.
During my Pre-U days, there was this guy whom I was very close with. We were like buddies. But jealousy hit me when he started dating his first girlfriend. This was when I realized that what I had felt for him wasn’t just friendship.
They broke up two months after. But he got together with another a month later. I liked him and I know he is also fond of me. Why won’t he pursue me? It hurts me deep each time he got together with another. But I waited by his side, caring for him, loving him, hoping that one day, he might be with me. And I waited for 3 years.
At the end of the third year, I came to know of a guy named Wind. He is a second year junior, a guy who gave his all to be with me. His pursuit for me was relentless, like a warm, gentle wind trying to sweep a leaf off the tree she is holding on to. I realized that this wind would bring this badly battered leaf to a better, far away land. I decided to give this wind a chance. I told Tree that I was leaving, hoping that he might ask me to stay. Tree just smiled and congratulated me. And I left Tree. I left, not because of Wind’s pursuit, but because Tree did not asked Leaf to stay.

Wind:
I’m Wind, a second year junior. I’ve fallen for a girl named Leaf. A girl who was very attached to Tree. I first saw Leaf a month after I’ve transferred to the new school. She was this innocent petite looking girl who is always watching Tree during our soccer practices. Every practice, she’ll be there looking at him, frowning each time he talked to another girl, and smiling each time he turned to look at her. And each time, I’ll be looking at her.
One day during our practice, Leaf did not appear. And Tree wasn’t at the practice either. An uneasy feeling overwhelmed me. I just had to know what had happened. I went to their classroom to look for them. There, I saw Tree arguing with Leaf. And I saw Leaf cried as Tree left. The following day, she appeared again, at the same place, looking at him. I went over to her, smiled and passed her a note. She turned to look at me and accepted the note. She returned me a note the following day that says, “Leaf’s heart is too heavy for Wind to blow her away.” I then wrote her another note, “It is not because Leaf’s heart is too heavy. It is because Leaf did not want to leave Tree.”
We started to talk more often after that. Though I know that I’m not the one she loves, but I know that if I persevere, she will like me someday.
For four months, I have had declared my love for her countless times. And each time, she will avoid the topic. And each time she did, I tried again.
One day, when we were talking over the phone, I ask her again to be with me. There was a break of silence.
And I asked, “Hey, still there?”
She replied, “I’m nodding my head.”
“Huh?” I exclaimed, not believing what I’m hearing.
With a louder volume she replied, “I’m nodding my head.”
I hung up the phone and sped down to her place. The moment she opened the door, I hugged her, tightly. But at the same time I was thinking, “Did Leaf left because of Wind’s pursuit, or because Tree did not asked Leaf to stay.”


got it? kinda sad rite?

Li.di.ya turned back time on 9:43:00 PM.

Taurus: Right in the nick of time, you will be the big hero of the day.**

woohoo~! today took back my cmaths paper. damn happy with my marks. 47/50! best in class wor.. not bad not bad... but cannot b too happy.. this is e starting only.. e Qs next time will surely b more 'gao nan du'. keep skipping cmaths lec.. my sets now a bit got prob le. din learn some of them in amaths e other time, now its like dunno wats he toking about. today's tut was like spending most of e time c him tok only... tok wat? i dunno...coz i was juz staring at him. tried to get them into my head but like 'xin bu zai yan'. damn bored lor.

b4 e tut had 4 hrs of break... so made use of it to work on my fnbd assignment tt is due on wk 11.... tt is nxt wk!!! ..... damn irritating.. couldnt get e colums rite... e way i wan it to b.. kept trying till 5...tt was like 4 1hr...zzz.. shit. late 4 tut le. -.-

fri no sch from 1pm onwards bcoz of CCN(dunno wat it stands 4.. sch thingy lai de) so should b staying back after cmaths lec to finish it. e make-up lessons will b on sat..-.-zzz... 4got which day gotta work again.. think its sat.. better double check on fri.

i m starting to have tt kind of "cant b bothered attitude" again.. ppl.. bear with me pls...


TUE:
Taurus: You are in a good, confident position to say what you need to say.**

damn cham. missed carc tut coz woke up late. hai.. so couldnt get my paper back...supposed to wake at 6 den went back to slp. when my aunt woke me up at 7.30 i went back to slp again... thinking tt my sch starts at 9. -.- woke up at 8 still thinking tt i should b able reach sch juz in time.. until kelly sms me.. asking me i reach sch liao ma.. -.-

din go 4 carc lec n make-up lec 4 prsp too. damn lazy liao.. some more no attendance taken. kelly n branda din go too, so in e end we were at 201 there having lunch. later went with kelly to suntec.. bugis (got a top from there..) , den chinatown n orchard(alone) to get my 'thing' from women'secrets.. hehe.. at last! den go home liao lor.. tired man...

'yi tian jiu zhe yang guo qu' le...

Li.di.ya turned back time on 10:09:00 PM.

Taurus: The next four weeks is a time for you to get more organized.**

yeah man... getting there soon... cant believe last sat i actually sat infront of my pc not juz stare at e monitor, but was working on a prsp lab Q wor..hehe... was typing away all e java codes n getting help from e lect notes n past lab/tut papers. not bad.. managed to complete 1Q 1hr later...juz a bout e time when andy called me to go 4 supper...(i will cont about this supper thingy later on...) n juz now i spent some of my time sorting out e subjects papers. v messy ah... v scared i leave out any of them. so went thru all e pages/slides on OLE n checked them 1 by 1.. lec by lec, tut by tut..blah...phew~ now my table is much more neater liao.. =D

planning prog 4 tomolo after sch liao.. ending at 11 tomolo coz of e make-up lesson 4 prsp lec. ok la.. still early.. 2-5 have lab 4 self-training?... there will b teachers ard la but not sure whether they will b providing any Qs 4 us to work on not.. hmm... wanted to go de..( cannot slack anymore le ma.. muz work hard liao) but in e end decided to go next week de ba. more time to find Qs to ask e teacher ma..(though i have 1 le la but find more better la.. 'sun bian' ma.) so tomolo will b going ahopping le ba.. gotta buy 'something' tt i have been wanting to buy since b4 e june hol..-.-" v cham rite.. ros also cannot stand me liao.. kept telling her i will b going to her place there(seiyu) to buy (coz got discount ma..).. den she will always call me to ask when on earth will i b really dropping by..haha. ya la.. wanted to go sentosa sun tan de also... but.. hai... dunno la...

ya.. really bth some of my class ppl.. act until so.. wah.. really bth lor. there's 1 'chee hong' guy. hop from 1 girl to another. 1 leave him, he 'jiu' hop! -.- who e hell he thinks he is.. cannot let him do wat he wants lor.. CANNOT give him e IMPRESSION tt he can do watever he wans lor! warn tt girl le.. she still like tt.. really dunno wats she thinking.. cant she c wat kind of person he is?! suddenly so close to her. nowadays go to places with him.. we ask she 'jiu' dun go..-.- zong se qing you ah? DUN B FOOLED BY HIM AH! ask 4 pity only.... bth ah~~~ dunno wats she thinking... watever. cant b borthered with her le....hai. i m sure tt if she rejects him too he have no "place" to go liao... unless change class la.. den got new girls liao lor.. gd 4 him! -.-""" 'wo jiu shi yao kan ta tong ku' la... wahaha~~~~~~~ *evil* teach him a lesson ma.. qi si ren.... another 2 also.. 'gou nan nu'.. 1 have bf le still flirt ard with another... hai.. poor bf man.. "dear" here "dear" there..even infront of our classmates.-.-... 'nong jia chen zhen' ah.. though they kept denying it but we can c de lor.. not juz me lor.. think even e whole class also can c..obvious lor... c both their characters ah.. they a bit those desperate type la..

sometimes really wanna change class man.. bth ah~ c them also sian liao.. spoil my mood ah.. but e rest of e ppl r alrite la.. though din have e chance to tok to some of them... hmm..

yup.. 1 by 1 have 'dui xiang' liao lor in our lec hall.. not really 'dui xiang' la but at least some1 to look out 4 ma.. nicks kelly n branda give them.. "bartender " la.. with thick framed glasses.. "street guy" la.. haha.. n i dun have any...hai... interested but dunno them de wats e pt.. rite? e "street guy" yue kan yue not bad.. curlyhair.. eh...haha.. not trying to snatch from branda.. but ya lor.. cute la.. branda said 1st day of sch when they sat beside each other in e lec hall n she ask him a Q.. he juz said something like:" shh... listen to e teacher." 0.0! ..lol.. funny man he... hmm...

v cham hor.. i like gossiping here.. well.. let u know what kind of idiotic ppl i have met out there ma...


SUN:
Taurus: Tact and thoughtfulness seem to have left the building entirely.**

back to e supper part... after midnite liao so its sun lor.. so when we were walking back to my blk after supper nuting happened lor(almost kicked e offerings though.. chinese 7th month ma..). later when were walking back again after getting canned drinks from a vending machine ,tt was 2blks away, something scary happened. *glup* a cat kept following us. all e way man... to my blk.e scary thing is tt it kept looking back when it stops. ...... as if looking at something.. ............. u know.. animals actually can sense "those things" rite... *glup* tried to keep my cool... den wanted to take e lift but e cat kept following us. scared tt it would follow me into e lift so i juz stayed at e void deck....until 1man came out frome lift! .. at this time..(2am + liao..) heng ah.. den quickly got andy into e lift. when he went back downstairs to go home..e cat din follow him liao.. den i was thinking...it was following me ah? 0.0! ehh.... bleah! din think bout this '7th month' thingy so much until now.. coz of e incident... ...........*glup*

den later go slp liao... at first tot tt i was working at 7 until i remembered i should b doing 2 closing this wk.. so... more time 4 some serious slp!

anyway.. i was wrong.. woke up from a terrible headach.. dizzy n felt like vomiting... din know wat was happening to my body man... felt terrible. all e way to work.. felt better only after taking e acti-fast? panadol. hai... den was working with e malay girl again. tot with e sup =( den later in e evening she asked me:" why u so quiet? r u always like this? or only when working with me? 1st or 2nd?" i said 2nd. =X true wat...nuting to tok to her about.. always so lame de..n sacarstic...i cant b bothered with these ppl lor.. trying to get (my) attention only.i told her u have things to say juz say la! dun have to wait 4 me... wat u wan me to say? lame jokes? (like u?) -.- pls...ya la.. she those talkative type la.. make funny noises only.. at 1 pt she asked me i dislike her huh..of coz said no lor.. like unwillingly like tt..=X lol... ya lor.. den actually finished cleaning up all e things b4 12 de.. tot can go home early.. but drag till 1 coz of all e paper work..-.-" i wanna go home slp de lor... de when taking e cab told her outside departure hall gate 3 n she went arrival hall. some more din have e hp with her..-.- luckily e cab came late also.. if not i would have left without her.. hai.. in e end change today's shift with her... though get to work longer hrs than on fri.. but e tot of working with tt' hao chi lan zhuo' de girl i sian liao.. nuting got nuting to say also..wasting my time there.. bored to death.. so might as well dun earn tt extra 12bucks? yup...


Fri:
Taurus: You can't trust everyone - even the people you used to trust.**

was carving 4 e porridge @ chinatown so after sch went there 4 dinner with kelly. *BURP!* eat till damn full there....after e porridge, 1 bbq wing, tofu n yu sheng... walked ard.. look at more food! keke.. den later it was desert time! had e peanut thingy... watery watery de.4got wat its called..den home sweet home liao. =)

Li.di.ya turned back time on 11:17:00 PM.

Taurus: Don't be too critical of your loved ones. They are just human.**

sian ah sian...now dunno 'fan' wat also... keep thinking about some things.. hai.. tomolo sch reopens liao.. assignments havent do.. havent done anything 4 e group project. ......1 week of hol so fast 'guo qu' le... after this gonna look thru e assignments n find ads on PCs 4 tomolo. siti wans us to go to sch at 9am tomolo to do e carc project.. sian ah! tot could slp till 11. tomolo's classes 4 e whole of tp start at 1pm onwards ma coz of e graduation thingy.. hai.. HAO MEN AH! kill me ba, kill me....

hao sian ah! how i long 4 something exciting to happen to me...

Taurus: You are on stable ground with your lover. Build on what exists.**

yesterday out again.... went shopping with kelly @bugis! hehe.. at last managed to find a nice top. bought a 'ring-watch" thingy too. cute wor.. pink 1 some more..-.- ... haha... later den went to marina for e concert to c ZHANG JING XUAN! omg... sang 'duan dian'! crazy liao.. again.. while he was singing 'My Way'... he actually walked dwn e stage to shake e ppl's hands. i walked to e front too.when i almost got a chance to take a pic of him upclose, he suddenly turned ard n walk up e stage.. -.- damn it! no chance again... @$#%@#& there were other singers too... 2R (their voice not bad.. sweet.. but too bad i dun know canto, otherwise i would b able to understand wat they singing) , electrical (rock band from sg, their songs really not bad too) , ben yeung, zhang feng qi... blah... overall not bad la e concert. know wat? we actually stood 4 bout 3 whole hrs juz waiting 4 zhang jing xuan to come out. -.-"" u know how tiring tt is ba...

ARGH!!!! i m bored!! its driving me crazy!!!!!!! I HATE THIS!!!!! ok... i got nuting to type liao... wasting my time away online with no1 to tok to.. gotta get out of here liao.. mayb wun b blogging 4 e next few days ( jing tian ri ji kong bai mei you guan xi. bu bi mei jian shi qing dou zai yi~)...gotta refrain myself from using my pc le. so long.. fare well..its time to say gd bye....~ *gone 4 gd*

Li.di.ya turned back time on 9:54:00 PM.

Taurus: The passion in the air can be explosive if you aren't careful.**

it was out till morning again yesterday. went Hendrix at CQ n ClubIII at MS. at first my mood was spoilt liao lor. went in Hendrix with kelly, branda n her 2 malay frens first while andy, leonard n ta ming went to draw out some money from e atm machine. waited so long dao 'bu nai fan' le den decided to call them... when we did, they were already at ms. -.- sickening! 'pian' us go hendrix. actually i din wanna go too lor.. coz so many malays..(actually it was every1 lor..) think e guys also sian.. no chi girls to c.. mayb i should have said i din wanna go in.. hai.. but tot go c c .. $10 bucks only. but poor guys la.. had to pay $28. guys 'jiu shi chi kui' de..kinda not worth it too lor..ok la.. mayb cant blame them too.. but.. at least tell us rite! we dun call den wat? juz make me n kelly wait there meh? -.-

inside hendrix damn small lor.. e dance floor is pathetic. i could have guessed tt huh coz CQ.... wat can u expect? den e music is all r'n'b. dunno how to dance lor.. all e malay girls there...eeee...... saw 1 pregnant lady also there...-.- (bu hui ba..) still i dunno y branda likes to go there...hai.. devil's bar is e best la.. DEVIL'S BAR ROCKS!!!!! YEAH! e music they play.... although e dance floor is slightly bigger.. but e whole place is BIG lor. c lai c qu wun sian ma...have 2 rooms, places 4 ppl to sit ard... tt place is highly recommended!!!!! o ya at Hendrix.. if u r below 18 u will get a band instead of a chop. get plastic cups 4 soft drinks too... haha... ya saw an ex kc sch mate there too...... actually CQ is gd place if u looking 4 pubs n wanna hang ard.. drink...

clubIII is small too but its still bigger than MS there...mirrors everywhere.... mayb its used to make e whole place look bigger.... or... let ppl c themselves while dancing. -.- din know e songs they play there are all techno.they play spirit of yesterday..blah... n surprise surprise... SATISFACTION! saw a few girls (or ah lians) screaming those cheers (yo ah~ yo ah~ yo ah yoah yo ah~... den mei you~ mei you~ mei yo mei yo mei yo~ (mei you=dun have in chi) -.- looking at themselves in e mirror n screaming like hell... as if nobody's business. techno songs r ok la.. but not ah beng ah lians lor...ya.. had a hell of a time there.. especially e guys.. haha..doing all e pole dance la ..blah (although no poles 4 them la.. they use human, mirror n a pole-like thingy at 1 corner) .. lol SAX-SAY!

after tt we walked all e way to CQ....esplanade there....ard 4 plus den took a cab dwn to geylang... 0.0!!!!! do wat? eat la! walk till hungry liao.. andy damn funny lor.. when he managed to flag n stop a cab, he juz tell e driver: " 5ppl go geylang." !!!!! dunno wat e driver was thinking la but it sounded as if we go there do wat like tt...lol...'kai fang'....go hotel.. 1 by 1 rejected us... said coz scared of rd block..so no choice but 2 take 2 cabs there....sui bian la...

at e 'you tiao' there ate quite a lot of things.. den at e other table...there were about 7 guys? n 2 girls.. e guys were thinking whether they r 'those kind of ppl' not..abit 'china looking'.. mayb they think too much liao.. hmm... mayb e guys of e other table also thinking about e same things huh... if yes den they r so damn wrong. after eating 'bao bao' liao its time to head home!

b4 e clubing thingy me n kelly went orchard shopping... however.. din manage to get anything.. hai.. when u really wanna get something always like tt de.. dun have de... den took neo print! hehe... with my new hairstyle! yeah!!!!

Li.di.ya turned back time on 3:44:00 PM.

Taurus: Spend as much time at home today as possible. It will heal you.**

thursday liao~ suppose to slp 1 hr only den go to work in e end overslept! woke up only when T1 called me n i was like looking at e clock. shit! 10plus liao! den i told him if i go will reach ard 12. no point rite work 4 3hrs only... so i said i not going ba.. he was like pissed off ba... juz hang up e phone.. den i go back to slp again...hehe...

AT LAST I CUT MY HAIR SHORT! went bugis de Chapter2 4 their colour contour package. includes cut, treatment, colour, highlight n style. not bad la...though dun have 'nu ren wei' le..tomboy le.. at least i change my hairstyle le. but think if my fringe isnt tt short it will look better la... but ok la.. nice la nice la... mayb juz not used to it... c short hair weird weird de. long hair still e best. colour my hair e girl cute lor... could c tt she was trying to tok to me but... but eh... cute lor... in e last part she came back to c how my hair le. she was like: " hmm... not bad.. more style le...look different le =D." keke... i was like ya lor.. at least change hairstyle le.... i told her wanna change ma coz all along long de... sian liao.... she was like "ni she de meh?" of coz not lor.. but wat to do.. sian liao.. some more juz cut my hair den not satisfied.. so wth.. CUT LA! e cutter also cute... 1 part she was like: " hai hao they left 'ji gen' of my fringe 4 me to cut..." haha...den toked about face shapes... i found out tt they cut e fringe 4 ONLY $5 FLAT! know i go there liao....hai... next time next time...

after tt went TAXI at bugis junction find my old frens (used to work there) since i there ma... den 1 girl couldnt recognize me lor.. not coz of my hair leh... its tt she really dun remember my face! i was like toking to her den c her kept looking at me.. staring den i asked her she know who m i not.. she dunno. -.- mei liang xin de dong c... tt time 1-2 months ago some more went MU with her n frens n lynn....hai... den later go find ros at seiyu also.. c me say i look more mature le.. ah lian again..-.- coz i highlight my hair red again... ok la.. mayb next time try other colours liao... hai... red something different ma...

den later its to DEVIL'S BAR! woohoo~ long time no go le.. heng i can go in ah...like e songs they play lor.. e live band also not bad.. they play songs like linkin park...britney....milkshake... shut up n SATISFACTION! haha...stayed till 3 only coz damn tired ah.. my legs too... was damn slpy lor...coz of e drinks? until later meet andy go eat supper at 201 den 'jing shen' le... later go somewhere tok cock also. till 6. took a bus home wanted to buy e loreal shampoo 4 coloured hair but my hosue dwnstairs dun sell... wa lau... some more waited 4 him to open e shop.. go in dun have..-.- scared my colour later come out again.. foam pink pink again... den its slping time! (o ya juz now while waiting 4 ai ling.. i saw 1 aunty bout 30++yr old in a red silky? halter dress walking here n there infront of me... tot she looking 4 something or wat but when i saw her 2times approching 'ang mo' man.. hmm.. u know wat i'm thinking.. i think she is 1 lor... cannot b wrong. she old man still... hai.. tts y kena rejected la.. think if e 'ang mos' go clubs cfm can get better 'huo se' de...)

tonite think wun b going home again liao.... will b going Hendrix with branda kelly andy they all...hmm.. sian lor.. no free drinks de... coz only above 18 can.... hope they dun check la... b4 tt me n kelly going shopping first at orchard!!!! later e guys will den meet us there... now e branda dunno going not.. (hai.. after saying so much..) said there having some competition tonite. watever.. we will still b going ba...

Li.di.ya turned back time on 3:03:00 PM.

SUN:
Taurus: Save the best for last, so that you have something to look forward to.**

din do much ba today. was working with a new malay girl. she was from delifrance? like e rest.sian... trying to b funny only. but i no mood to laugh at her lame jokes lor. -.- cant b bothered with these kind of ppl. e way she tok damn sacarstic also. asked me m i this quiet everytime. i told her depending on these elements: who wat where blah... n if she wanna tok, have things to say juz do it...correct ma.. no need wait 4 me. i have things to say or ask i will open my mouth. c also c my face fierce fierce le. gd lor. dun try to b funny with me lor. after work went pw awhile pass dad something coz tot of cutting hair also but close. -.- .hai.. den later andy say sian wanted to go tm hang ard or c movie.couldnt think of any nice 1 so i tot y not come my house c vcd? e 1 tt YS lent it to me. din have time to c n some more gotta return it to him when sch reopens le. kelly wanted to c also so asked her n branda along too. luckily kelly at grandma house, near near so could come. e show so so only la. a bit stupid also some parts.not bad lor. managed to c 3 out of 7 disc. tot only 1... coz started at 6plus. a v last min thing lor. den c e last episode of 'happy fish'. after tt went to eat. n den home.

MON:
Taurus: Loved ones respond to you in new ways. Romance is on the upswing.**

IT'S SG'S 39TH BIRTHDAY!
early morning receieved a call from a fren whom i havent been contacting liao. no. not in my contact list n i din really go c e no. only after few of hello(s) n ya(s) den could i recognize e voice n who e person is on e line. shock. muz b too bored liao den call me. watever. was thinking should i say i was on e phone?but no, in e end i did not. i put dwn e other phone coz i wanna c wat he have to say.asked same old Qs again..zzz...a few mins later we both hang up. din know wat to say. anyway, was so tired till i almost fall aslp b4 he called.

den its working time at 6! kinda sick of tt place le...e ppl... e pay.... mayb i will really quit. den get other pt job like promoters. e pay is better. max $10/hr? den i can also concentrate on my studies ( tt is if i dun slack ). PRSP SUCKS! after my work went to cut hair coz my fringe damn long le, irritating me. planned to go airport de $10 hair cut but too many ppl le. damn siao lor.. so many ppl on national day go airport cut hair. -.- in e e end went simei there cut. sickening de lor.. cut till now my hair look so sucky. fringe too short.. now my back hair also so short. so toot! ARGH!!!!! asked her to trim only lor.. stupid malaysian. not going back there anymore.. $14 bucks somemore. i know cheapo la but tt time i went to e $10 1 n 1 at roxy $8 only (aunty cut too lor but gd hor.. wanted to go there but dun think its open. public hol. sun went too but close. tue lazy to go all e way.well... mayb i should have waited huh.) n they did a better job. e stupid malaysian kept saying nowadays 'liu xing' like tt. like wth.. short n i look toot lor. this is call 'liu xing'? no taste man.juz trying to say tt her skills r gd...-.-

tue actually have a v impt appointment b4 work. but now i have to cancel it. really a bit e 'mei lian jian ren'.

later went 4 e stupid fireworks thingy at e esplanade with andy, leonard, ta ming and kelly but din c anything at all. -.- sian~ my concert also in e end din c... dunno its there not.. i next sat wanna go c leh.. got ZHANG JING XUAN ! i MUZ go. i WILL go. no work anyway. den later went 4 dinner den i went home w/o them le.din know wat they wanted to do also. kelly would b alone so thinking should go too not. but nah.. they can go enjoy themselves w/o me.din wanna spoil their mood. i sian sian de also. so after e 2nd time when i said i going home i juz turned n walk away. if not will b standing there till dunno wat time.(v cham lor.. now if everybody keep repeating this word "anything", i dun wait liao. i will make e decision 4 them. so wan or not cant blame me. i dun wanna waste time.)was damn tired lor. walked till i tot my legs were gonna break. v 'suan' lor. when i was working i practically stood e whole time. i was so tired tt i fell aslp on e bus. when i reach home it was slp again.

another day is gone juz like tt.


Taurus: You can be stable without having to be tense or uptight. Relax.**

yup e moment i woke up i called up to cancel e appointment. she sounded so.. hai.. as if she din care. still thinking whether i should go not on next tue ard e same time.its juz tt i m curious about tt thing lor. n now i m here blogging away... later its work again. all e way till 12. planning 4 my day tomolo liao. dunno going sentosa not. branda not going. kelly dunno. c my sis working tomolo not if not i ask her wanna go with me not. or gek ling. this is e best time to go lor coz its weekdays n only tp having hol this week. there should b kinda quiet ba. dunno la! if not stay at home c vcd le. n do my sch assignments? BLEAH ~ n now i remember. TOMOLO IT"S WED! devil's time! long time no go le.sms ai ling e other time but din reply me. >=( i hate it lor when some1 does tt. ask her again later or tomolo. if not i c Ivy going not after her work. hai... o ya.. but my hair is like shit, how to go?c i toot toot comfirm check de.

heard Nelly Furtado's TRY on my mp3 player juz now.her other songs also not bad.. powerless blah.. "n i c u standing there,wanting more from me, n all i can do is try ~" dun really know wat e whole song is about but i juz look at this sentence.really lei lor. to meet ppl's expectations of u. u live 4 urself. not others. so y should e things they say affect u? ya we do try to please them, but not all e time pls. its damn tiring. tts wat they always say: be urself! yup. but do not think too much of urself tt u hurt ppl's feelings, i dun mean tt. but i really cant stand those ppl who acts infront of u. damn fake lor! 'jia ren". 'zuo ren zuo' till like tt 4 wat? sian... if ppl think tt i m v quiet, i will try TRY to find things to say. if not tok rubbish like some ppl meh? like juz tok 4 e sake of toking. make a fool of myself only...no1 listen also wat 4? tok to myself better. sian... i not an interesting person la.... sian...

they say when a quiet person dun tok juz listen when in a group (though look abit extra la), e person is e 1 tt observes e ppl in e group. how they tok , their actions. this kind of person will easily c wat kind of a person they are. wat about u? which 1 are u?

Li.di.ya turned back time on 12:19:00 PM.

Taurus: Passion is everywhere. Spirits are high. Join in or be left out.**<--yesterday's

Taurus: Someone will pour on the charm to try and sell you something useless.**

now juz finish bathing after e whole day out with my classmates. tired tired.. in 1 hrs time will b going to work liao..zzz... tired but cant slp. 1 more hr also no point.so juz take this time to blog.

today(or should i say yesterday?)abit e fed up lor.suppose to b an enjoyable outing with my classmates(actually it still was ba) after our term test until SOME1 spoilt it. haha as if its our exams, term test only also celebrate.

after sch went pw play pool den kbox(had a crazy time there man.). din realise schs will b having national day celebration lor till we c go many 'kids' in red t. playing pool some more! bth.. ok la i also 'gin na' la but when u c those small size de playing a bit weird leh.... den later at kbox also 'du lan'. service bad la blah...den 1 fren brought along afew other classmates w/o our(me n kelly who planned this whole outing) de consent lor.. -.- no respect lor.its not tt we r v close to them also. weird lor. some more say we 'pang seh' him. made us more mad. always say this kind of things. he should b mind his words lor.insensitive de leh. dun think b4 he speak de..ownself asked them to come without us knowing only till they reach pw. they got another rm so he juz moved from 1 place to e other. who pang seh who first? who kept asking wat we gonna do on fri after prsp paper? who said he wanna go? if he had other plans juz go ahead la.. not tt its a MUZ to go out with us. some more different group n we din know they were coming! i mean.. juz go with them la! i dun like those ppl anyway. ..... those ppl i had mentioned e other time. 1 seriously think acting cool. 1 of this week's morning while walking into sch, 1 of them kept staring at me lor at e bench. from far c liao lor.all e way till i walked past her. this is not attitude prob ah?act cool only. si ah lian.not tt i against her lor. wth she really wans from me? she wanted to say hi or something? wat? wat? wat?! enuff lor. everytime i c them i also sian. i juz look else where.

den after e singing session both groups came out. we planned to go steamboat de lor but those ppl going i no mood le lor. eat with them..-.- ... den go all e way to marina south.... we all stood there like more than 5 mins? couldnt decide where to go eat. in e end me n branda juz walked n e rest followed. if not think no need eat le.. e other group think were still standing there. later they join us at pizza hut, at another table.-.- they really din have to follow us lor. after dinner we quickly walked out. they almost followed.*glup* u c... its damn troublesome lor to go out in a big group. different suggestions. wanna go c movie also difficult to get tix. fri so many ppl de.

in e end 4 of us(a few left liao) went ps to c THE VILLAGE. not a bad show actually... mayb not tt scary la.. but e ending is something different lor. tts e part i like. e village looked as if it is in e early 1880s or wat... but actually its during our modern time lor. last part where e person working in e reserve wildlife thingy saw e girl in those clothes found in olden times. bet he damn shock man.so tt village is actually in e wildlife reserve thingy, n so called "e woods". v creative ah.. curious about e movie? go check it out urself! i find it interesting lor... coz there's a twist to it.mayb not to u la.. but not bad ba... e ending is not wat every1 expected.

den kelly took a cab home alone. leonard din go if not they could share e cab coz they both staying in serangoon. me , branda n andy took nite bus. me n andy took e same 1 coz branda's bus doesnt stop near my house. i dun wanna walk all e way from CGH to my blk k.. damn far ah! walk b4 lor.bout 3-4bus stops. another nite bus stops at tamp blk 201 lor. 1 stop only, nearer. den andy walked me home b4 walking back to his house. tt was about 3 stops away in tamp.

so.. conclusion 4 today: wun b asking tt idiotic person out anymore. make ppl du lan only. next tue mayb go sentosa with kelly n mayb branda.. tt time asked us wanna go not but think he can go himself lor. or go with e group of girls eh.. ;) <---wo pui!

Li.di.ya turned back time on 4:22:00 AM.

Taurus: Strong beginnings can't come without having definite endings first.**<-- true true

today's carc paper not so bad la.. coz did study abit, know wat e paper is toking about..but a few parts din remember properly..wasted. surprisingly they din ask bout the BIOS ,Power On Self Test thingy, tot it will surely come out.

after lunch with e girls we saw e zhou chong qing n wei bing? from 93.3fm. mayb they were there to shoot e 'xiao hua xiao cao' thingy.

slping time again! after tt den study prsp. b4 i go... here's a few quotes 4 u ppl.dunno how to put them up under e 'Meaningful quotes and readings' coz when i do.. it all goes to e left.if i free go explore e html thingy den transfer them to there.n yup.. another song i like by Lin Jun Jie(actually his songs also not bad), Dou Hua You Tiao(soyabean milk n you tiao). kena influenced by my classmate coz he kept singing... v cute song. go check it out!


QUOTES:

- "I will take until i decide 1 who is finally deserving of me giving."

- "Wounds nv heals, it juz becomes a part of u." (by Jacky Wu)

- "U can nv b too sure because things r unpredictable."

- "U will only know how much u love the person when u give in a relationship."

- "Passion burned very prettily, but sooner or later e flames went out-- or left a scar."

- "U cant measure a relationship in time.Not chronological time."

- "Age is about e no. of yrs u've been on e planet, not how human being interact emotion-wise."

Here's a story i heard on 93.3fm on "shuo shuo er yi" last nite (tt goes something like this): God and an angel were watching a man from heaven playing golf alone. e angel knows tt e man isnt a gd person, therefore he requested God to punish him. However,none of them failed to go into e holes.e man was v happy. when e angel sees this,he was v angry.He kept asking God to punish him, make his shots miss e holes. God told him he knows wat he is doing n ignored e angel.the angel became more angry n aked God 1 last time:" y r u doing this?" In the end God juz replied:" this is his punishment. although he had all his balls in the holes, he has no frens to tell about this. he does not have any1 to share this happiness with."

The moral: we need frens to share out happiness as well as our saddness. otherwise it would b v unbearable.

indeed...its v 'tong ku' de. keeping everything inside us....

Li.di.ya turned back time on 3:17:00 PM.

Taurus: Your body is sending you messages. Listen to them carefully.**

yesterday went popular awhile with ros, heard jay chou's songs being played at e cd-rama. a bouncy..hip hop? kind of song was playing n 2 malay guys were like dancing..(or bouncing?) along..keke.. damn cute ah.

really pei fu him... e song he write v nice de. damn talented man...*envy envy* feel like getting his cd. but if buy tt time should have ordered earlier..have his 'xie zhen ji', more worth ma.. or i juz go dl la..=X kelly sent me e 'jie kou' not bad.. nice lyrics.all his lyrics damn meaningful de lor.. touching touching hai... sometimes hen xiang listen to his songs but.. reminds me of some things only..sometimes really try to avoid it. .. gui ji, qing tian, duan le de xuan... n this.. JIE KOU. qi li xiang not bad too...

here's e lyrics of 'JIE KOU'...i m like now replaying it again n again lor,listening carefully to e lyrics ='( :

翻著我們的照片 想念若隱若現

去年的冬天 我們笑得很甜

看著妳哭泣的臉, 對著我說再見

來不及聽見　妳已走得很遠

也許妳已經放棄我　也許已經很難回頭

我知道是自己錯過　請再給我一個理由說妳不愛我

就算是我不懂　能不能原諒我

請不要把分手當作妳的請求

我知道堅持要走 是妳受傷的藉口

請妳回頭　我會陪妳一直走到最後

就算沒有結果　我也能夠承受

我知道妳的痛　是我給的承諾

妳說給過我縱容　沉默是因為包容

如果要走　請妳記得我<--y should i b doing tt? (如果難過　請妳忘了我)<---have always been trying

[e pain is the promise u gave me~] I HATE SWEET TALKERS! ='{

hai~ watever.. over jiu over le... no point liao... tts y its not ez to win me over! i not so stupid to kena cheated. but if u r a damn gd actor,den gd 4 u!

Li.di.ya turned back time on 2:32:00 PM.

Taurus: Today is a quandary. You are restless, yet also seeking calm.**

back at home after CMaths paper. at least 1 paper is over. but e worst is to come. 3 major subjects which i seriously need help.maths not really a prob actually but its juz tt my expectations 4 maths is much more higher. coz its an ez sub,all about formula, so muz pass... with flying colours tts e best.my maths is, u can say, best sub among the others. so all 'quan kao ta le lor'... i panic lor while doing e paper, coz i muz make sure my ans r correct.but i needed to do them fast too. was like looking at e clock kept thinking i muz finish by 4.30 den rush ah. but not bad.. actually its till 5 so actually had some time to check. but nah.. sian liao.. c all e binary digits..1 n 0... some more so cold in e lecture hall so got out of there lor...

v cham ah have this pc at my house. always have e urge to go online.no web 4 me to surf also, but juz wanna find frens to tok...sian ma.

fan also. need to know my work schedule liao coz too many plans liao, but e sup nv msg me.-.- hai.. need to go Singapore shopping centre 4 something, go sentosa sun tan, go my devils bar, go buy my 'nei zai mei'.. from tt time till now..meet yup with andy n erica(v long time nv c them le..1 yr or more le ba. e andy la... v bz with his work. a financial planner wat do u expect?) wat other things..... alot jiu dui le. n i almost 4got i ahve got fndb n carc assignments.-.- bz bz ah.. carc project havent done a single bit also, later siti fed up liao. wah lau.. some more gotta work. 'mei shi jian..wo mei shi jian...'...

ok.. i shall juz go study now...tata~

Li.di.ya turned back time on 7:48:00 PM.

juz now went dad's place to collect a cable so tt i can start using e internet. den went parkway walk abit..c hp, find my things. so late le..i m like suppose to study now lor... from 2 till now... ok.. gonna off this pc soon after i dl finish e jcreator. today shiok ah.. no sch.. coz this week is term test. will b having my first paper tomolo n tt is CMaths. wth.. did a few Qs only. e other sub havent even touch. last min of study again. tried to study so many times but when i wanna start, i begin to feel slpy. den i will go slp. zzz..zz.... damn cham. my 2nd CMaths close book exercise failed by half mark. -.- wonder how will i do 4 my tests this week. was suppose to study yesterday too but in e end moved this pc from my dad's house. do this kind of things wo jiu "qi ji'er" le... wiped my table la... pack a bit to make space 4 my pc la.. ahh~ damn tidy now. =D

hai.. if i fail e papers dunno wat i gonna do. feeling a bit useless actually. study also cannot study properly.slack so much.go work also sian.. wat can i work as?

speaking of work. last weekend de business was so poor. we were like bz 'pai cang ying'.sun worse still. no sandwiches to make,fruits to cut coz they were all done by e others e previous day. so spent e free time stare into space, use e pc, c tv, tok cock with my sup(alot of funny n stupid things happened to him b4.he alot of stories de.used to b a police.-.- hao ren dun have liao ah.. even e police also like tt). n also..EAT. e sup la... big 'wei kou' he have.. den pei him eat too. yesterday ate 1 sandwich, 1 subway 6-inch,fruits. den he go 'gai gai' 4 food n went to e foodcourt upstairs where e food r more ex than usual. tried to stop him from buying in e end join him eat. -.- bought e fried rice n hor fun n we shared.fat liao lor... tt time nan de lost some weight now put back on liao.. they used to say '"u slim liao ah..".. n now its " u seem to b shorter liao". tts wat my sis fren said e other time when she came to my house to stay overnite. hai...a bit e true.. but she damn cute la.. a bit tomboy de. tt time went chijmes look 4 my sis after work she was also there. couldnt find my sis so i asked her. it shocked me when she said "who r u?" tot she was joking at first but later found out tt she couldnt regconize me at tt moment coz i was dress quite differently from e way she saw me e other time at home.. (if u c e jap cartoon called 'nan nu qiao qiao ban',a vvvv cute n nice cartoon,last time shown on channel8 sat afternoon u will know wat i m toking about.. v aunty) keke.. other times when she c me she also 'jia jia' "who r u ah"... she so funny.. cute la.

la.... cant wait 4 e tests to finish. den go eat gd de with kelly they all.. sentosa sun tan la..my devil's bar! so many things too do.... ok i think too much liao.. still early wor..keke..

Li.di.ya turned back time on 4:50:00 PM.