The Greatest Pain in Life

  The greatest pain in life
is not to die, but to be ignored.

To lose the person you love so
much to another who doesn't care at all.

To have someone you care so about so much throw a party...
and not tell you about it.

When your favorite person on earth
neglects to invite you to his graduation.

To have people think that you don't care.

The greatest pain in life,
is not to die,
but to be forgotten.

To be left in the dust after another's great achievement.

To never get a call from a friend,
just saying "hi".

When you show someone your innermost thoughts and they laugh in your face.

For friends to always be too busy to console you when you need someone to lift your spirits.

When it seems like the only person who cares about you,
is you.

Life is full of pain,
but does it ever get better?

Will people ever care about each other,
and make time for those who are in need?

Each of us has a part to play
in this great show we call life.

Each of us has a duty to mankind
to tell our friends we love them.

If you do not care about your friends
you will not be punished.

You will simply be ignored...
forgotten...
as you have done to others.

 

Taurus: The Full Moon is in your sign. Let it all out and don't hold back.**

having bad mood again... feeling kinda low. everything is coming back to me.. yes..AGAIN. all bcoz of my fren. told me about his things which reminded me of mine. kill me man kill me. i m seriously sick n tired of this.

i have alot to say actually but i juz dunno how to start.nvm...dun think i will b including them here today. nobody can help me n i will b kinda repeating myself anyway...4get it.

god... my head is spinning.

i feel..STRESSED.bored.MAXED OUT.hurt.ANGRY.confused.MISUNDERSTOOD.disappointed.TRAPPED.frustrated.LONELY.numb.EXCLUDED. blahhhh................

im not an actress. this is e way i m. u r c-ing e real me. so take it or leave it. "coz this life. is too short. to live it juz. 4 u. when u feel. so powerless. wat r u gonna do? say wat u want."


Left outside alone- Anastacia

Left broken empty in despair Wanna breath can? find air Thought you were sent from up above But you and me never had love So much more I have to say Help me find a way And I wonder if you know How it really feels To be left outside alone When it? cold out here Well maybe you should know Just how it feels To be left outside alone To be left outside alone I tell ya.. All my life I?e been waiting For you to bring a fairytale my way Been living in a fantasy without meaning It? not okay I don? feel safe I need to pray Why do you play me like a game? Always someone else to blame Careless, helpless little man Someday you might understand There? not much more to say But I hope you find a way
TUE:
Taurus: Vote with your wallet. Put your money into places you support.**

went orchard with ros n angeline. supposed to go john little to interview 4 e cashier position but backed out e last min. in e end went to Bedazzled-a costume jewellery shop. CHEN GONG! starting work this sat. not bad. den later at far east there guess who i saw. its sg singer HUANG YI DA with his fren!.. ok la.. not bad la... not really crazy bout him also. 4 dinner. went to aljunid? met my sis n dad eat vegetarian food. -.- tt was my first n last pls. its HORRIBLE. was DISGUSTED man. e meat tasted like e cream which doc would give 4 ur chicken pox lor. =P~~~~~~ pui! how could any1 enjoy eating tt? YUCK! if it's not 4 my dad's bday i wouldnt have gone there! after dinner, was waiting 4 my bus with my sis at e bus stop when we saw a... sort of a "tim sum" coffeeshop or wat. den my sis bought me an egg tart juz in time when my bus came. so sweet of her. it was damn nice man. gonna go back 4 more next time. another sweet thing my sis did was tt she called me on my hp juz to ask where i was sitting on e double decker coz her bus juz passed mine. hehe... den at e rd junction managed to spot her b4 her bus turns rite. was waving to her kinda frantically when i noticed e guy siting 2 seats behind me peeping at me behind a girl's head,trying to c wth i was doing.. haha... who cares. =D nuting means more than my sis. =) not even my so called "frens"...

went dwn to changi aloha chalet. n i almost got lost. got kinda fed up man. changed a few buses n walked quite a distance to get to tt stupid place. if not with e help of e bus drivers i would have gone home! den ya.. sort of regretted going there..(again) did nuting much there.. c tv.. played 2-4games of dai dee. learnt a bit of majong from ta ming while they were playing. yup. den nuting else. got kinda bored when they e rest were playing wrestling (so sorry tt i m not into those ok...) taking pics or watever shit.couldnt slp. in e end couldnt ta han anymore went to call my TT FREN to tok. -.- i know i shouldnt have done tt. den after tt was thinking of meeting up 4 breakfast since his work place was ard tt area too.. but in e end i din give him morning call or anything coz was thinking.. aiya.. wat 4.. if he really wanna go no need morning call also can get up de ma.. den 4get it. let him slp lor. after tt call they decided to play "TO1(used our tutorial group no. instead of sg) Idol". ok.. i admit. it was kinda cool n fun. we had e interview part n performing part. 4 e interview part e guys really looked like slyvester. with e "i will rock e idol world!" n tt hand signal he would always do. haha.. damn pro lor. 4 e performace part all we had to do was to select a song from e mp3 player n hold on to e air-con remote, pretending it was e mic. den we juz had to open our mouth n look as if we were singing. everything was recorded with e digi cam 4 later viewing. cool eh... all of this ended at about 5 n it was bedtime! at tt pt of time actually our cha;et phone rang. 0.0 suprisingly... without any1 knowing our chalet no. .. not even e other classmates.. n no1 called out using tt phone.. yet. *GLUP funny funny...


WED:

Taurus: Judge based on what you have seen, not on what you have heard.**

after every1 had woke up n bathed, we decided to walk to changi village 4 lunch. -.- seriously.. it was damn stupid to go buy 5packs of maggi mee lor 4 those 2 days b4 e bbq actually starts. 5x5=25packets. too much le lor. as if gonna have tt 4 their 3meals -.-. i rather use it 4 tidbits lor. -.- watever! in e end i din have lunch coz gonna meet my fren 4 tt too.adios man... yup. i actually went home. n i m seriously broke coz of this stupid thingy!

so in e afternoon slacked alot..played with my hp cam. e different modes. den sort of used e photoimpression to put a few pics together. it made me started to think again.. Y I M NOT IN DESIGN COURSE!!!!! argh... sickening..

at nite again was on e phone with my "auntie angie" again. we crapped alot. he wanted to change his msn so we began to have funny ideas. he was thinking of this song "lets get retarded" so we came up with a lot of stupid things with e word "retarded". ok la.. we were damn lame. this is how lame i can get if i m in a gd mood, n i know i m included in e conversation or wat. so slept ard 5 again...-.-

THUR:

Taurus: If you are going to take action, act toward peace, not conflict.**

slept till ard 1plus den i had to get ready to meet my fellow classmates to go 4 e bbq liao.. so basically did nuting much but eat n c tv. it's not tt i dun wanna help ok. watever la.. but kinda alrite.. had a bit of e "bonding" time with my classmates whom i seldom tok to. so left tt place at 10plus with john. though weng n py were stayin there n was thinking mayb stay over also not tt bad since they r there. but i stopped myself from doing tt. coz i dun wanna later regret again 4 making e wrong decision n i would b cursing myself again... well they can enjoy themselves w/o me.. it makes no difference whether i m there or not...take up space only.



i m like a puzzle. solve me. but no1 does tt coz no1 has e patience. every1 is changing. every1 is going after things tt they think would satisfy them which i think is more physically than mentally. every1 is trying to b some1 they r not., following e foot steps of others. mayb its wrong 4 me to use "every1" here.. hmm...

i may seem boring to u coz u havent really discovered e real me. its juz e surface u r looking at. tts wat most of u ppl r doing. mayb i m missing out lots of things while being a "boring person", but i sometimes think tt 'jian dan jiu shi mei'... simplicity is a virtue. so while i m being tt... some ppl r after fame, popularity(i m not toking bout celebrities here)...mayb they get a satisfaction from tt i dunno. mayb tts a gd thing.. making e most out of their lives while on earth. i dunno. weell... this is e way i m.. take it or leave it. i need no idiots to give me their stupid comments n expect me to change n b like them.b some1 whom i m not. no thanks man. u juz get out of my way will do. i still quite like e way i m.

i need some1 who i can trust. all i need is sincerity(meaning: The quality or condition of being sincere; genuineness, honesty, and freedom from duplicity.)

Li.di.ya turned back time on 4:23:00 AM.